The flip book disorder

Holy freak, what have I gotten myself into. It’s 20 minutes to 11, and I am in total freak out mode. As I should be. In less than 24 hours, I will be in front of a video camera, answering interview questions. What the frick? I am the one who does the interviews – and not in front of a camera. There’s a reason I did NOT go into broadcast journalism. Does the word “uhm” have any meaning for you? Well it does for me!

About a month ago, my super fit, B3 girlfriend who has the hottest, most enviable abs I ever did see, asked if I’d be willing to sit for an interview for her blog – all about marathon training. Seems simple enough right. I mean, I’ve trained for a couple marathons, even more half marathons, and have been running for a handful of years now. It’s a topic that’s right down my alley.


I’m smiling because there was no mention of videos at this recent tea date of ours.

And yet, I fought with this request. Oh man, did I ever. You see, I don’t like video cameras. Love still cameras, I’m a great poser for those, and if I don’t like what I get (or more likely what my photographer husband gets) I can just delete. But video, that involves talking, and talking involves facial expressions, as well as the word “uhm” – both of which I incorporate a lot of when a video camera is pointed in my direction.

I first discovered this ailment of mine a few months after my big brother’s wedding when the family and I sat down to watch his wedding video. And as I watched myself making my speech, which in the written form was a spectacular speech, but in the verbal form a disaster, my face was cringing the entire time. Every second word was “uhm.” Note to self, I said, don’t ever do that again.

But the thing is, it’s not just video cameras, it’s speeches in general. I’m a great talker when it’s one on one, or a few people, or an intimate crowd even, but when the spotlight is on me, I break down. Another wedding, my own in fact, I discovered the flip book disorder. I kid you not, you could make a flip book of my expressions when giving my speech.


Just a sampling of the speech photos; there were lots.

And yet, here I am, less than 24 hours away from putting myself through another heart palpitating, nerve wracking, hands shaking ordeal. She’s tried to calm me, tried to make me feel comfortable, tried to make me feel more at ease, but to no avail. I’ve tried avoiding it, ignoring it, not thinking about it, but to no avail. I went on the trainer tonight, thought that would help, but nope it didn’t. Hopefully my run tomorrow, before the video, will help.

It’s a good thing I really like this chick and absolutely love her blog!

Any tips for working the camera? 😉

TONIGHT’S TRAINER:
9:30 p.m. BG before: 8.0
Temp. basal: (none)
Time: 40 minutes
10 p.m. BG after: 3.3 (probably should have done a temp. basal after all.)

9 thoughts on “The flip book disorder”

  1. You are ABSOLUTELY entertaining, speech-wise!! 🙂
    Just have fun – no matter how painful – because watching you struggle is … entertaining!!
    You will be a Big Hit!! 🙂

  2. I have faith in you that you will rock the interview. Deep breath, relax, enjoy the experience and most of all remember you really like the person who asked you to do this 🙂

    Good luck!

  3. I agree with Freeman, have fun and you will be a big hit! Be yourself, those expressions are part of you and they are part of the reason we all love you:)

  4. um I um kinda um do the same um all the time when do public um speaking. go rock the interview and never go watch it no matter how well you do you’ll pick yourself apart. you got this!

    1. I totally watched it. Couldn’t help but put myself through the torture. Watched it twice even. And then, I discovered the arms – my gawd, they are hot! And my one and only redeeming feature in that video 😉

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